“If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.” – Lao Tzu
This quote once resonated well with me. I had accepted the idea that my anxieties were brought up by things that have yet to happen and my sadness would stem from nostalgia and a love for moments long gone. As I sit here starting my first post on my second blog I am flooded with feelings of anxiety and chaotic thoughts. This quote isn’t resonating very well with me today. I notice that in this very moment I am filled with layers of fears about having my thoughts recorded on this blog. Thoughts reminding myself that I am choosing to invoke fear within myself by using writing, a new medium, as an extension of my artistic practice. Questioning my fears to distract me from actually putting words down on this page. Reflecting on the idea that maybe these fears are about what happens after I press publish or perhaps that thinking about that is just my minds way of distracting me from feeling the uncomfortable nature of being afraid in this very moment.
Step one: Don’t just think about it, actually start a blog. check.